how ironic that i would have this thought and that very night need to drive myself to the hospital, praying that my baby would be okay. at 6:30 i burned the potato soup i was preparing for dinner and after trying to fix it, had to open the doors to air out the nasty smell that was incredibly strong. i told addison that she could look outside but not go out or she would step on bugs (she has a fascination with bugs). i went to the computer to try to find fixes for burned soup. every two minutes or so i would get up to check on addison and make sure she was not outside. at 7:00, about the third time i stood up to check on her, i felt a sensation and thought i had lost control of my bladder. i held still and focused on controlling it and was surprised that i could not hold it at all. i looked down and saw the carpet had dark spots on it and thought, "oh great i got it on the carpet." i put my hand there and about a cup of blood poured into my hand.
i ran to the bathroom and knew that things like this just don't happen to me. i tried calling my mom, wondering if i should go to the hospital or reach my doctor first. when she didn't answer, i called my doctor and left a message with the answering service for him to call me back. i started cleaning up my mess when my mom called back. i called my dad and we decided while i wait for my doctor to call, i should head to the hospital. i threw clothes on myself and addison and ran out the door.
on my way to the hospital, my doctor finally called me and after i described what happened he told me that i lost a significant amount of blood. he said that much blood could indicate a placenta previa and if my condition was bad enough, he would have to deliver my baby that night. i was terrified. the next morning, i would be 30 weeks, and a baby born ten weeks early can have significant problems, if the baby survives. i was shaking the whole way to the ER, trying not to cry again. i couldn't believe how slow the hospital staff moved when i told them what was happening. even though i was taken to a triage room within thirty minutes of arriving at the ER (about 8:45), the staff all acted so nonchalant, which made me want to scream at them. i finally was hooked up to monitors and many fears were relieved just by hearing my baby's heartbeat since she hadn't been moving this whole time.
kyle finally made it to the hospital around 9:30 after he came home and learned i was at the hospital. grandma brown, my mom and my dad were all there too. after being monitored for two hours, an ultrasound to check for placenta previa and other problems, and many questions that proved i was in perfect health, i was released at 11:00 and put on bed rest. the doctor and nurses couldn't figure out why i bled at all. this morning i called and made an appointment for tomorrow with my doctor's office to see if i can come off bed rest. bed rest has been awfully tedious for just one day, but i could do it for the rest of my pregnancy if i had to.
my aunt jenell said, it isn't until something like this happens to you that you realize just how attached you are to your unborn baby. the whole time this was happening, all i could think about was how i just wanted to hold my baby and know everything would be fine. even though i haven't met her yet, i couldn't imagine not having her and i am so thankful heavenly father protected her from many complications that could have made the situation much worse. and even though i never want to go through this again, i am thankful that it happened. i think i take for granted my easy, uncomplicated pregnancies and healthy babies, both born and unborn. i now have a small sense of what mothers who fear for their sweet babies go through during complications. i know everything heavenly father lets us go through in life can be a learning experience, and it already has for me as i have heard other women's stories, ending in either tragedy or triumph, since my small trial. hopefully the rest of my pregnancy continues uneventful, but even if it doesn't, i know that i will have my family and my heavenly father to turn to. i love addison and i love this baby mac so much already!